When To Stop Stalking (Online)

One of my guilty pleasures in life is the art of stalking. Yes. Although I just had to add the word "online" on the title because on legal terms, Stalking is a form of harassment, assault or threat towards another person. And there's no way that I have actually and will ever assault or threat anyone ever. Ni hindi nga ako makapatay ng ipis eh kahit nakakagigil na itong pigsain 😂.  So I stalk, pero sa social media lang like sa Facebook and Instagram ganun. It's not everyday din na I actually stalk someone, and before you conclude anything, and mga stinostalk ko ay mostly mga artista or mga tawng ganahan kayko and tig inspire nako ganeeern.

So the other day, I was stalking a celebrity sa Facebook, facebook page to niya. Ganahan ko mang save sahay ug pictures ug mga artista kay nindot man sad siya i-wallpaper panagsa bi labi nag si Taylor Swift na or Kathniel na, hays my hearttttttt. So ga stalk ko, then while I was scrolling on the page's feed, a name caught my eye. So this person, ni react siya sa picture atong celebrity. I am fully aware how stalking can go out of hand sometimes, and I know din na there are certain people on social media that I'm actually avoiding to stalk & even visit their profile for some.... mental and emotional purposes. 

And the funny thing about stalking is, di ra nimo mahibaw-an na you're actually jumping from one profile to another profile and then another profile, taman sa asa jud ka madala sa imong tudlo, and that's what happened to me. 

Now that we're on it, I have really made my self aware of the pros and cons of Stalking and actually know when to stop doing it. It can be healthy or unhealthy depende sa kinsay gi stalk nimo ug sa purpose kung why are we doing it.

PROS:

• Inspiration - I sometimes stalk for inspiration. A very good example would be Joy Prouty and her wonderful family. They ain't that popular but I look up their family often on Instagram mainly because I love how they live their life as a family. Simple na pamumuhay kaayo and very much influenced by the Word of God. Sometimes I vision myself na if I have my own family na puhon, I want to be living like the way they do - Country life and living for God. But be careful on this part though, as there's a borderline between making someone your inspiration, and causing yourself to have unrealistic and impossible expectations to look up on. We all know naman na most of the things we see on social media are just highlight reels from other people. 
• Update - Kung idol nimo, naay part nimo na gusto ka updated sa ganap sa iyang life hahaha, like I am with Taylor Swift. Taylor is a bit lowkey naman gud karon sa Instagram so sometimes I have to stalk fan pages kay didto mana nay mga news kung musta na sya, and if will she be releasing a new album soon ngana, or naa na ba poy new music video puhon.
• For Guide - We also stalk some media personalities for guidance, depending on your interest. Example, if we are on workouts and healthy lifestyle, then we usually look on people who post about their routine or food guide.

I seldom stalk my fb friends or real life friends/relatives on Facebook. Besides, 141 ra intawn akong facebook friends. And if I wanted to be updated with their life, I can chat them anytime and mangumusta. Mang stalk rako ug suguon kog "Cinds istalk ragud akong profile, tan-awa daw ug totyo ba or need nagyud mag change ug featured photos." HAHAHA Yes that happens. Ana raman siguro ta maninuod ug stalk ana nga person when we know na di nato sila pwede chatan, sample kanang crush nato. Kinalisuran pod noh ug mangumusta tag "Hi crush, kumusta naman ka? naa nakay feelings nako?" Pero ug ka dare ka, go frieeeend, I am rooting for youuu!

Dito naman tayo saaaa
CONS:

• Stalking becomes unhealthy when we are doing it to hurt ourselves. Perfect example would be stalking your exes, specially when you are still in your healing process. That's why it is really recommended to disconnect yourself from them for a while, not atleast until you're healed. Ana ra sila ifollow back or i add friend balik pag nakamove on naka nga kanang di naka affected if ever you came across with their pictures/faces again. 
• If stalking worsens your overthinking mind, stop it. This happens siguro pag naa kay gipangselosan, or punong puno ka na ng mga pagdududa sa jowa mo. So you go to your partner's friend list and stalk his/her facebook friends na feeling mo ay maaaring ipalit sayo. LOL bes, nangita lang jud kag bikil. Di man hinoon na malikayan na naa tay selosan, but we aren't just triggering unnecessary fights with our partner, but we are also ruining our self esteem. Kanang pag nagselos ka ana na person bisan wala gud unta na silay something, you go and compare yourself and then toinks - overthinking and insecurities is already eating you. Ana nata magsugod ug duda/investigate pag you are actually seeing signs na gyud na your partner is cheating. Kana day, kumbati na dayun HAHAHA.
• Too much stalking can lead to insecurities and self doubt. Nangyayari to if we stalk certain people na gikasinahan nato or person na feel nato kakompetensiya nato. But dear, life is not a competition, and life is never about comparing each other. We have our own beauty, we have our own character and personality, we have our own interest, and syempre we have our own timeline. Just because he/she is better in Academics than you, doesn't make you dumb. Just because he/she has a perfect love story, doesn't mean you should pressure yourself to having your own romantic relationship too. Ako, I've been through this before in high school. That's why my high school life wasn't always all glitter and gold. There were times na I used to feel left out kay akong mga classmate, matay HS pa gani kay blooming na kaayo, ag ako yagit kaayo. Akong mga classmate kay laysho nag mga cellphone, nya ako kay keypad lang. Good thing I saved myself from all these unnecessary insecurities when I actually found my own set of barkadas - mga barkada na ka vibe gyud nako nga makahitapok gyud nako. Sukad adto, nawad-an nakog pake sa unsay naa sa uban, kay I was grateful na sa part nga naa koy friends na pareha nako, nga taking up our time as young, playful, happy-go-lucky teens. Bahalag way uyab basta daghan pod mig crush, bahalag wala sa mi mga layshong cellphone basta kay katext namo ang usag-usa nya ang topic kay mga crush rapod hahaha ngana lang ba happy2 lang. So to anyone out there na sig stalk kay ga compare2, itigil mo na yan, you're wasting your time. Take your time in growing and glowing, because even caterpillars take their time before they turn into a butterfly.

 Siguro by those points, you can distinguish na kung when you should stop stalking. Walang masama sa pagstastalk kung naa pod ni syay good effect nimo, pero when you know it na it's affecting you negatively, then control yourself and stop. Let's practice in living our life without comparing ourselves to others or making a big deal out of other people's business. Focus tayo on what matters, like our own growth, our family's wellbeing, and our bond with God.

Naay point na wa ko kabalo ug sa pros or sa cons ni siya ma belong: kanang pag stalk ninyos inyong crush 😂. Pros if nig stalk nimo, kiligon ug malipay naka maglantaw sa iyang nawong. Pero ma Cons siya if nig stalk nimo, makit-an nimo nga naa na diay siyay ka char2/uyab so masakitan ka 😂. Ikaw na bahala decide ug asa na category nimo siya ibutang ha? Ciao!