Handling Major Life Changes

It's crazy how I just now realized that I fear life changes, or maybe not all - just the big ones. 

When I was growing up, I guess my life was pretty stagnant, except for the part where I'm compelled to handle changes like transferring to a new school, relocating to a different place for two months for my internship, or resigning from my job to try another work. These changes I've mentioned were bound to happen. After all, you can't go to college if you don't transfer to a university, right? And you need to resign from your job if you want to try another role.

But I didn't realized until this month how life changes are scarier when you're at stake of losing something important. It's the type of change wherein you need to weigh things a million times before settling on one decision. The type of change I'm talking about is the change, wherein it makes you feel uncertain about the future. 

Or maybe, it's not the change that's scaring me. Instead, it's the possibility of losing something - or perhaps someone, because of this change. I'm not sure if I should talk about what exactly is this moment, but maybe I could open up about it soon. 

I'm already in this part of my life wherein I'm comfortable with where I am, who I am with, and what I do. But life recently opened new doors, maybe not for me, but for people around me. And when the time comes that they'll have to enter these doors, I'll still be here. I'll be here, waiting for them to go through journeys that I'm not a part of. 

I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'm scared. I'm scared, but I'm happy. I'm happy because a new door is a good thing. A new door means a new opportunity, a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. But I'm scared because I'm new to this and I don't know what to do. But these were the things I first felt.

1. Anger

I'm not in any way proud that I actually got mad at first, but honestly, I did felt anger for a moment. I felt angry because I was already contented and happy with everything that's going on around me. But then I realized how selfish I sounded. I only thought of how happy I am now, without considering that maybe some things had to change because the people around me need to pursue their happiness too. My anger only lasted for a couple of hours, and then the next thing I felt was sadness.

2. Sadness

I felt sad because this significant life change will be a big adjustment for my life. This type of adjustment is something I never experienced before, and I'm not even ready. Most of all, I'm sad because I feel like my happiness is about to be taken away from me.

3. Fear

I realized that what's about to happen will be a fearful one. This big decision made me feel uncertain about my (or our) future. I wasn't anymore feeling any anger, but sadness and fear were both prancing around my mind and my heart. As the big change is fast approaching, I was making scenarios in my head out from the fear of losing something or someone. 

4. Acceptance

Lastly, I had to accept that this change is going to happen, regardless if I'm ready or not. After a few days of deeply thinking about it, I eventually reached the part where I accepted what's about to happen and that I must go through it like everyone else. I'm not the only one on this planet undergoing changes. If I wanted to grow as a person and learn much more about life, I need to accept and handle changes and learn something from them. This will be scary, but hopefully, this will be worth it. Hopefully.

5. Hope

Yes, I am hopeful, and that's the stage where I'm at right now. The fear is still here, I admit, but hope is deafening. I'm hoping that even with this significant change, everything will still be okay. Things may never be the same way anymore, but hopefully, I wouldn't lose anything or anyone.

Wrap Up

I wanted to prepare for the worst like I sometimes do but, I didn't want to drown myself with negative thoughts and a pessimistic outlook about the future. Doing that will only hurt myself. It's like I'm hurting myself for things that have never happened yet. So now, all I'm left to do is accept changes, deal with them, and hope that everything will still be alright. After all, "change is the only thing constant", right?

How about you? How did you handle life changes?